Greater Delight

This entry is part of a series on Psalm 119.

How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth! Psalm 119:98 NIV

It has been my greatest joy recently to serve as a Pastor. The generosity and kindness of those entrusted to my leadership has regularly been both emotionally motivational and overwhelming. Motivational in the sense of being inspired and prompted to grow and challenge myself spiritually and intellectually so that I can lead and teach the families in our congregation. Overwhelming in the sense that their trust in me as a pastor continually drives me to the Bible and prayer to seek God’s grace, blessing, guidance and provision, without which I could not have lasted past my first day on the job (so to speak). It has also profoundly affected my priorities in how I seek to manage my time during the week. I find that (with the help and encouragement of my wife) I need to be more deliberate in taking time to spend with my family so that they remain my foremost in my earthly affections. I also find that some of the novelties I could previously ‘toy’ with have faded in their appeal.

I used to collect Phantom comics. Since about the age of 10 or 11 every 2-3 weeks when Frew Publications would publish the next adventure of ‘The Ghost Who Walks’ I would lap it up, thoroughly enjoying the adventures of the 470 year old champion as he battled against crime, cruelty and injustice. Yet looking at the bottom shelf of the bookcase in my office at home I can see a pile of unread Phantom comics that I haven’t looked at for years. I can’t even remember the last time I ventured into a news-stand to buy one. Perhaps this week on my RDO I’ll indulge, once, if time permits

I also used to love arguing and debating. Well, to be honest I still do, but my priorities have made this a novelty rather than a habit. In High School, when I started to develop my public speaking skills, the action of the debate team was an irresistible temptation. To be able to win an argument through either convincing rhetoric or clever manipulation of ‘facts’ provided a cheap thrill. To enhance the experience I would try to get on the opposite side to what I might normally or naturally agree just for the sake testing my ability to argue regardless of the weight or consequence of the topic at hand. I could have said I was doing this to better appreciate the opposite point of view, but in reality it was the thrill of the fight I enjoyed. I continued this silliness into Bible College where I would happily play devils advocate and take an ungodly delight in confusing or confounding a younger or less mature opponent. When confronted about my uncharitable approach I decided I could better use my ‘skills’ in apologetics (arguing for the defense of Christianity). I actively sought to engage any number of enemies from any persuasion; cults, Catholics, mardi-gras, politicians, work colleagues, movie goers; I was indiscriminate. But the thrill was not so much in persuading someone to enjoy the life offered by Jesus Christ as it was to demolish an argument and win a debate. I and they are poorer because of this. Not because of anything inherently bad about apologetics, just that my approach lacked a humble civility that might have been more productive for the Church.

As a Christian first and a pastor second, the Word of God is to be my greater delight and the source and stimulation of my spiritual affections. I am glad that our Deacons recently encouraged me to continue with my series of devotional thoughts on Psalm 119. In doing so they have encouraged me to find, with the Psalmist, a greater treasure in scripture than what any fleeting pursuits or hobbies might engender. It focuses my priorities as a minister of the Word and compels me to weigh my time carefully and seek that which results in the greater glory of God not my pleasure or the promotion of my skills or reputation. However small they might be, if used for serving instead of showing off, God is the one who gets the credit, for that is my chief and highest end.